Thursday, December 30, 2010

Question for all...

Co-sleeping...it's been a battle for quite awhile now, but hasn't really been an issue until, of course, P came along. Since the kids keep saying that they are afraid to sleep in their beds, every night, I lay down on the floor with the two of them in E's bedroom. I lay down in the middle so there is no arguing about who is next to mommy and they cuddle close to me. I stay until they fall asleep - for E that's very fast, but since e is still taking naps at pre-school, she takes much longer...sometimes up to an hour...and, of course, I often fall asleep, too. I typically wake up about an hour later and go to my room. Then, in the middle of the night, e usually wakes up and joins me...often with E by her side. Now, I have to say that I really don't mind this whole process. I get to cuddle with my kids, and I know this stage is not going to last forever -- so I'm enjoying it while I can. I'm pretty sure I'm not creating some Oedepus Complex or anything like that with my kids. This gives us time to talk about the day and be close. I think it's also possible that once e starts kindergarten and stops taking naps, she'll be more likely to spend the whole night in E's room.

When P visits, it's a bit more of a problem. He feels left out when I spend so much time putting them to bed (I know, waah, waaah), and doesn't like when they come in to invade our bed during the night or early in the morning (don't worry, we are both fully dressed). I explained to him that I am working on the bedtime routine, but they really need me right now. They will be on their own when they are ready. In fact, I've been having a lot of conversations with them about "being ready" so they can make the transition. I've thought about putting e in her own bed after she falls asleep, but she is a fairly light sleeper. I'm pretty sure she would wake up as soon as I picked her up.

So, should I just not worry about this and tell P to basically get over it? Should I be more forceful in getting them to sleep on their own? That just seems like a very long torturous process....I don't know....thoughts?

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Long Time, No See...

e swimming at the hotel

Well, I've been a really bad blogger lately, haven't I! I'll try to update everyone on what has been happening! We went to Hawaii for a week the week before Thanksgiving...had a really great time. The kids even traveled well for such a long trip. It took us about 18 hours to get there and three planes. Fortunately, the trip back was a red-eye, and only two planes, so they slept quite a bit. The day after we returned, I put them in the car again and we drove to NC to spend Thanksgiving with P and his daughter. That is a VERY long drive and not one I want to do again. We stopped at our friend's house in DC which is about a 3 1/2 hour drive from my house...P's house is another 7 hours from there.
E swimming with a sea turtle!

So, how did things go, you are wondering? Well, I have to say that I think the honeymoon period is over. I still really like him, but I'm not so sure, anymore, that he is Mr. Right. It is definitely different seeing someone on their own turf. I am also not willing to make that trip again very often, or even at all....It's WAY too far to drive with the kids for a weekend, and if I flew there, I would still have to pay to have the kids taken care of for the weekend. That's a lot of expense and hassle just for a weekend. Besides, I really like spending time with the kids...although, I know that time away with another adult is also a good thing.

So, here are the things that are bothering me....The distance...I just don't know how willing I am to work on that aspect. So far, he seems okay with traveling, so that's good. I also think there are some generational differences between us (he's about 19 years older than me)...he smoked cigars while we were visiting...a lot...he watches old movies all the time...he talks about the news business all the time (he used to be in the news business) and how terrible things are run these days. When he's not talking about the news, he's talking about jazz. And, a lot of complaining! I was considerably colder when I returned from NC and he definitely noticed it. I, of course, didn't talk about all the things that I just listed - just a couple. And, of course, he said all the right things that just made me melt.

He's coming for a visit again on Thursday, so we'll see how things go. I'm not sure how long he's staying...he didn't say...just left it open...I'm not sure I'm thrilled about that. I have lots of work to do, so I'm kind of hoping he doesn't stay too far into the week. I doubt I will have to worry about it.

So, maybe I should just enjoy the fact that I can have sex with someone for awhile and not worry about all this relationship stuff? I don't know. I think he is really in love with me, and I do kind of like the idea of having someone around to do "adult" things with. I'm just beginning to think that I need to find someone with closer interests. So, should I reopen the online dating portals? Do I even tell him that I am doing so? I would say no...especially since he is not in the area. Does that mean that I'm cheating on him? This is very complicated.

Anyway, the kids had a really nice Hanukah and a nice Christmas (we celebrate both). Santa had to give e an IOU for a DSi that didn't arrive on time. I ordered it from China and I'm beginning to think that it got lost in shipping....I have to say, though, that the customer service from this company has been beyond extraordinary. They have communicated with me regularly, and even said that if the box was lost in shipping, they would express a new one and send me an extra 20 games with it for free. So, for just over $300, I got the DSi, 248 (!) games, some other stuff, and now, potentially another 20 games. I figured I can sell some of the games to game stop and maybe even make money on the deal. Yes, I'm always looking for a good bargain! :-)

Hope everyone has a wonderful New Year!